How to build a successful relationship

We often talk and discuss here on our couples therapy website and also to our clients the importance of building a successful relationship.

We are going to share with you a fundamental step towards building successful relationship. Many couples simply fail with other couple counsellors because unfortunately the therapist does not understand the importance of well formed successful outcomes or how to achieve this with the couple. 

In order to create and build a successful relationship we first define what success means to you by following a specific process and asking specific questions. This is something many therapist do not apply or understand as in our experience some people define success in negative terms - such as living without pain, living without arguing ect. We invite you to view success by finding and saying what you want positively. We help you get to the core of what success means for you. And by following specific processes we help you to create a clear vision, meaning and purpose for your lives.

The couples we work with are often very surprised by the results! They come to understand what it means to create success - and why they were not able to do be successful in their relationship, and what was missing in the past. More importantly they combine understanding with action and rebuilding their relationship, creating new experiences, and moving forwards.

Knowing what you really want is the key to success. This is why it is fundamental for us to work with you to formulate your vision of success to begin with, sowing the seeds of what will develop, grow, and come into being in your relationship.

What makes a relationship successful?

A misconception of building successful relationships is that success has an end point. There is a difference between success and a successful life. If you just focus on success you are limiting yourself but if you focus on a successful life then the successes along the way are goals part of a bigger picture.

As you live your life you will experience and achieve many successes along the way (and remember to enjoy and appreciate them) and use these successes to allow the foundations of your relationship grow from strength to strength.   

Ten steps to build successful relationships

Use conflicts as an opportunity for growth.

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Have an active, fun, loving and spontaneous sexual relationship.

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Learn and move on from mistakes of the past and work forwards together.

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Learn and use "real" communication skills to change the way you speak and listen.  Speak with truth, integrity and honesty and listen with an open mind and heart.

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Keeping your passion alive. Be spontaneous and create loving meaningful moments.

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The ability to manage conflicts, arguments and disagreements and use these as an opportunity for growth

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Understand your partner's needs and how to meet them,  let your partner meet your needs and support each other.

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Put your partner first.

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Appreciate your partner.

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Work together as a team and towards a shared goal.

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Smile, laugh and have fun together

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Working with us

Do you want to build a successful relationships?  The first step is to call us and let's have a meaningful conversation and if we know we can help we schedule your appointment.

Contact us

John Donlon Couple Counsellor and Relationship Coach